I’m glad February is the shortest month of the year. February is associated with my least
favorite Hallmark
Holiday, Valentine’s Day. Before
my brain tumor diagnosis, I was a pretty active guy. You would rarely catch me at home, however, I was more into
“hanging out” with girls rather than “dating.” I never liked labels. I had just gotten out of a 7-year
relationship when I moved to San Diego, and I was in a new and exciting city as
a young professional fresh out of physical
therapy school. I’ll admit I was having a lot of fun! When I got diagnosed, all my close
friends and family were back home in Michigan. I made plenty of friends when I moved out to San Diego, but
the friends that stood by me during my recovery were something else. They
became my San Diego family.
For that, I’ll forever be grateful! I decided to stay in San Diego because most of my friends in
Ann Arbor, MI were gone. I would
have had to move back home with my parents if I didn't have insurance, but I decided that I should stay in San Diego to take advantage of all the rehab opportunities here in San Diego.
My parents decided to split time to be with me in San Diego and Michigan, which
ultimately lead to their divorce.
The tension in their relationship had been building for years. Their
decision to get a divorce was shocking but not surprising. I’m still very close with both parents,
and I don’t hold ill will towards either of them. I’m glad they finally did it for both their sakes. For my brother and me, the divorce was
much easier to handle as adults rather than kids. I sincerely hope they are both happier now!
As for my current relationship status, I have no time to
date. My priorities are:
- My personal rehab
- mAss Kickers Foundation
- Traveling
- My hobbies: sports, reading/writing, movies/videos
- My family’s/friend’s well being
- My Spirituality
- Hanging out/relaxing
This doesn’t leave much room for an active dating life. HAHAHA! Couple the above priorities with post treatment fatigue issues = no dating
scene for me! Relationships are just another
thing that I don’t want to waste my energy worrying about. I don’t have the energy to deal with added drama in
my life because my plate is already full!
I’m not sure other survivors/thrivers feel the same. It will be interesting to read everyone’s
thoughts. I’m curious to get their
take on relationships.
It positively affected my attitude in my life but it took me a while to come to terms with it.. My boyfriend of three years abandoned me after my surgeries.. And it was just the worst timing.. I went back to state with him because he really wanted me there and then broke up with me two days after I moved into my apt.. He's an ass but it made me a lot stronger.. Now I'm just kicking some mAss in my recovery.. I'm doing amazing now..
ReplyDeleteyikes! tumors/cancer def "complicate" relationships. in the end you find out who your real friends and family are... it's a "weeding out" process
DeleteMy boyfriend of 3 yrs also dumped me after my diagnosis... He hooked up with another woman during the week that I was having my first brain surgery (!) and when I got home from the hospital, he told me that she would be moving in with him.
ReplyDeleteAnd after three brain surgeries & nearly 50 grand mal seizures (yes, 50) I have been a single gal for many years. It's pretty tough to find a guy who has the cojones to stick by a lady with a malignant tumor & a seizure condition... So I've decided not to wait around and have had a whole lot of adventures on my own in the past 14 years!! Just a few months ago I completed my goal of visiting all 50 US states :)
the way i look at it is that he probably wasn't strong enough to be with you! hope you surround yourself with strong people. glad to hear you are doing well!
ReplyDeleteI admire you, Eric!
ReplyDelete